Dubious Job Board Listings

We’ve probably all had to look for work at one time or another and read through suspicious sounding job descriptions in the classified ads. This is the inspiration for the following group of job postings for a town or city adventure. I wrote these specifically for my wife’s solo game, but I imagine they could also be used with a larger group. Low level party members might be interested in the opportunity to take mundane jobs and earn an income between sessions (with the DM relaying some of the things they experienced at the start of the next game.)

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Entry level position for woodcutter and aspiring carpenter. Minimal experience necessary in this small but growing business. (Coffin-maker)

Nimble and fearless individuals may apply for the honor of helping a nobleman liberate some of his buildings of undesirables. (Rat catchers and forcible eviction assistants)

Down on your luck? Looking for lodging and work? Friendly, outgoing, and healthy women are always needed at Angie’s Overnight Inn. (Obvious)

Hardy individual wanted for local courier position - free drinks provided during work hours! (Water-carrier)

Looking for a little person for a big job - help renovate an important local building.
(Halfling or Dwarf wanted to dig out an overflowing permanent outhouse)

Sales position - Enjoy meeting your neighbors and working outdoors. Our product sells itself! (Knife “selling” thieves are looking for help casing future targets)

Unexpected job opening - work for a nobleman. Our staff drink like kings! (Cupbearer needed to check for poison)

Like animals? Local dog breeder and trainer needs part time help. (As a human target -and to clean up their kennels)

Help Advance the Magical Arts! Jeronymous is looking for an assistant. Easy work! (Human guinea pig)

Porters needed for subterranean expedition. If interested, leave a message with the Innkeeper.
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I included that last one so a player might see their own job posting in context and realize why it might be hard to find decent help - most of the locals know full well that these jobs suck. Maybe someone else can use these, or be inspired by them for their own game. Here’s a PDF (without the true descriptions) I’m using as a handout, formatted for a 5x8 index card.